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Top 5 Reasons FWTC Has Been In Hiding

You may or may not have noticed that FWTC has been “off the air” for most of the year.  Why?  Why in God’s name would be deprive the world of US?  I  mean, this site is comedic gold!  What could possibly explain WHY such a tragic thing would happen.  Your reader mail has gone unanswered, there has been absolutely no East Coast earthquake coverage, and NO REN!

Hold onto your swords. Don't commit seppuku just yet.

To satisfy your curiosity (real or imagined by us) here is a list of five potential reasons we’ve been incognito.  Which ones are true?  Beats the hell out of me.

  1. Ren finally got her Playboy shoot and ran away from us.
  2. Roode finally snapped and went on a killing spree.
  3. Adel realized that she’s has two Ph.Ds and was too good for this bullshit chuckle factory.
  4. Tresckow went into hiding for reasons unknown.
  5. Ren.  That’s it.  Just Ren.

Actually, it was a combination of things ranging from site glitches, author availability, family issues, career issues, clinical depression, and all sorts of other lame ass stuff.  Here’s what we can promise:

  1. We’re going to ease back into regular publication.
  2. We’re going to “re-release” some of the “vintage” articles to help pass the time.
  3. We’ve got an assload of articles waiting in the queue.
  4. We wish most of 2011 never happened.
  5. We’ll keep listing shit for the sake of listing shit.
  6. Ren will be in your nightmares.

That’s it.